So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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