nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize