The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
