no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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