we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize