Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
