Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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