READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Did I show you my penis last night?
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
