Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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