He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i will never coherently bang her
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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