the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
