the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize