Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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