doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Princesses don't give blow jobs
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
