I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Randomize
