If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
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