Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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