I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
