We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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