I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize