So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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