So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
