Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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