So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
