i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
