You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
