make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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