I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Couch. On fire.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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