I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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