Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
