i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
