Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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