I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You can't just leave with hair like that
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
