So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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