oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize