Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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