I don't think brook has ever known best
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
