May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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