Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
