he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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