i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
