i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize