yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
operation have a gay friend backfired
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
