What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
