hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize
