he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize