Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Randomize