i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
