I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
