I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
